


I Don't Like Girls

by cheekaspbrak



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mike Wheeler Being an Idiot, Season/Series 03 Spoilers, Will Byers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-09-06 03:57:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20285014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheekaspbrak/pseuds/cheekaspbrak
Summary: I fixed the “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls”/Castle Byers scene. I hope you all enjoy!





	I Don't Like Girls

**Author's Note:**

> It makes no sense at the end bc we're just gonna pretend there is no mind flayer problems yayyyy!

Will’s heart was thundering so loudly in his ears that he couldn’t hear anything else Mike was saying. His lips were moving and he was looking at him intently but Will’s breath was caught in his throat, trying to find a way out. Will began to feel lightheaded before Mike even noticed that he hadn’t made a sound in quite some time. Suddenly a hand was on his shoulder, which made him jump back.

“Hey, are you okay?” Mike asked, like he always did, with concern in his eyes. His hand dropped away from Will’s shoulder. Will tried to convince himself that he was getting worked up for nothing, that the churning in his gut was ridiculous, that opening his mouth would only make the situation worse. But there was this gnawing feeling in his chest, like a secret trying to crawl its way out with its imaginary claws tearing at his ribs, pushing back against his lungs, knocking out any air he tried to breathe in.

“What did you mean by that?” The words tumbled out even though he fought against them. He felt his body shake, not from the rain and the breeze, but from fear.

“By what?” Mike was dense, always had been, but right now Will wanted to yell at him for being so dumb and making him have to do all the talking.

“You said I don’t like girls.”

Mike’s brows knitted together out of confusion which, Will fondly thought, is how he looked nearly all of the time. The warm feeling this thought sparked in his stomach was quashed immediately by a clap of thunder. Will’s eyes turned towards the sky briefly.

“I don’t know-” he paused, looking like he was trying to figure out why Will even cared, “I just meant that you don’t seem to have any crushes on girls like the rest of us.”

He shrugged, using a hand to wipe away the droplets of rain that had fallen on his left arm. 

“So?” Will questioned defensively, immediately regretting his tone of voice. 

This time Mike squinted at him and Will felt like a little kid trying to get away with something while his parents interrogated him. He shifted his weight back and forth between each foot, and opened his mouth to talk again, but Mike beat him to it.

“I’m sorry, man. I didn’t mean you’re gay or anything like that. I just meant you don’t have a crush at the moment.” 

Mike’s lips turned down in disgust when he spoke the word “gay”, and Will had to look away to hide that his lips were trembling.

“Right,” He said quietly, then added, “Okay.”

He turned to look out at the pouring rain, the tall green trees, the old station wagon in the driveway. It all reminded him that he lived in Hawkins, a small town where everyone knew nearly everyone else’s name, where the large majority of the people had voted for Ronald Reagan. He had seen the magazine articles about how the President was refusing to comment on the AIDS epidemic, aside from a few horrible jokes that made his eyes and nose sting with tears. He couldn’t have expected Mike to react any other way, and yet, he did. 

“Are you okay?” Mike inquired again. The rain poured down even more, and Will had to raise his voice to respond.

“No,” he gripped onto the front of his bike, “I’m going home.”

The whirring of his bike as he zipped down the road helped drown out whatever Mike was yelling after him. He didn’t want to talk anymore, he felt more like an outcast now than he ever had throughout middle school, even after “returning from the dead”. He knew Jonathan had said being an outcast was a good thing, that it made him unique, but he wondered if he would say the same thing if he knew that he liked boys. Part of him defiantly thought “it doesn’t matter if they approve, you should be allowed to love who you want” but another, much more deep-rooted part of him cried out desperately for approval and love. 

He found himself in Castle Byers, sobbing and tearing apart drawings and pictures and so many memories he knew he should keep but couldn’t be bothered to care about. He had felt a lot in those past few years- sadness and heartbreak and terror- but not until now had he felt this all-consuming rage that was seeping down his spine to his shaking fists. His mind was so blindly angry that he was not even sure if he was mad at Mike or Lucas or Eleven or the mindflayer or his dad or…himself. Maybe he was just mad at himself. If he could just be _normal_, even though Jonathan hated it, his life would be so much easier. He could like girls and talk about how good they looked in shorts and he wouldn’t stutter whenever he was scared and maybe he wouldn’t even _be_ scared if he was just…normal. His body moved on its own as another noiseless sob came out, his breath shuddering. He climbed out of Castle Byers with a bat in hand, shook it around to feel its weight, then lifted it up over his head. He screamed as he brought it down, and _WHAM!_\- it came down on a hand outreached to stop it. He scrambled back, chest heaving and tears pouring down his face. He felt fear wrap around his heart like an old friend before he recognized that the hand was attached to Mike who was now shaking his hand wildly and shouting various curse words.

“Oh god!” he groaned, rubbing it with his other hand, “I don’t know why I thought that was a good idea.”

Will felt horrible instantly, lunging forward to inspect the injury to the best of his ability with tears still streaming out of his eyes. 

“Are you- are you okay?” He stumbled over his words as he winced at the bruising already evident on his hand, but Mike pushed Will away to get a good look at his face.

“Seriously?” He asked incredulously, looking equally amused and upset, “You’re having a full on meltdown out here and you’re asking if I’m okay?” Will closed his eyes against the new tears flooding to the surface, finding comfort in the knowledge that Mike was there because he wanted to make sure he was okay. He thought about the pictures he tore up moments ago and whimpered quietly, his head hanging low.

“I’m so sorry.” The words came out as a hoarse whisper and the bat dropped to the ground with a loud thump. He felt Mike’s hands come to his shoulders. He wanted nothing more than to reach forward and hug him, but he stayed perfectly still. 

“What are you sorry for? I’m…I’ve been a terrible friend. This whole summer, I’ve been terrible. Lucas and I were talking on the way here and I-” He swallowed nervously and dropped his hands down to his sides, “I’ve been so involved with El that I haven’t been making any time for you.”

Will knew he was right, that he _should_ be apologizing for constantly blowing him off. But he also knew that his jealousy was abnormal, that it stemmed from something other than being a hurt friend. He looked back up at Mike, ready to apologize again.

“I’m also sorry for implying that you were gay.” Mike said, so quickly that Will almost didn’t hear it. He took a step back like Mike had slapped him. He could feel hot tears spilling over onto his cheeks again, and he started wiping at them angrily, “Will?” Mike’s hesitant voice called over the rain.

Will looked at him again and took all of him in. His frizzy hair, his soft brown eyes, his sharp nose and jaw, his stupid yellow button up. He wanted to remember him this way: doused in rain, one hand appearing to reach out to him, eyes narrowed with care and concern. He wanted to be able to think about this moment years from now, not the one that was sure to unfold: the look of disgust, the way his hands and body recoiled, the way he turned on his heel to stalk back to his bike.

“I _am_ gay, Mike.”

He tried to say it with as little emotion as he could, but he could hear his voice waver nonetheless. Mike’s eyes fluttered, he looked confused again. Will desperately wanted to believe that he wouldn’t pull away, that he wouldn’t laugh about it with Lucas on the way home. But he watched as his fingers twitched and his mouth moved around soundless words in bewilderment. 

“You’re…gay?” Will squeezed his eyes shut tightly, only nodding his head in response. He could hear the fluttering of the blanket on Castle Byers, the booming of thunder miles away. He could feel the droplets soaking through his hair, running down his scalp, and warm, skinny arms pulling him into a tight, bone-crushing hug. 

His eyes opened like a bolt of lightning struck him and he threw his arms around Mike like it was second-nature. His lungs were filling with air like he hadn’t been breathing for years. He felt like he was floating on a cloud on a warm summer day, not sobbing in the rain. It took him longer than it should’ve to realize that Mike was also crying into his shoulder. He stepped back from the hug to stare up at his face. When was the last time he had seen Mike cry? Had he ever? 

“Why are you crying?” Mike’s smile was small and sad, and Will suddenly remembered the last and only time he had seen Mike crying. _‘You said yes”_ echoed around in his head, Mike smiling down at him with tear-coated lashes. 

“Because I’m gay too!” Mike’s voice was rough with tears but his eyes were beaming with joy, “I mean, I’m not entirely gay, I’m like…half? I think? I like girls but I like guys too and-” As he chattered at a hundred miles a minute, Will’s heart rate sky-rocketed, “-oh my god, I never thought I would be able to say that out loud.” He choked out the last sentence, a strangled sob caught in his throat.

Will had no words, and yet so, so many. His chest moved up and down but the rest of him was completely still.

“You…like…guys?” Was all he managed to get out before his bottom lip started to tremble. He didn’t know why he was shaking- maybe from relief, or excitement, or fear. Everything he’d been telling himself from the first terrifying moment that he’d caught himself lingering on Mike’s lips- that he was insane, and gross, and wrong- was being debunked right before his eyes. Because this was _Mike_, and he was saying he felt that way too. 

“Yes!” Mike answered, giggling, “And, more importantly, I like you.”

“_What?_” Will spluttered, “Me? I- you like me? What about…what about El?”

Mike’s face had gone from overjoyed to nervous as Will spoke, “El and I just broke up, I know. But, I…I don’t know. It didn’t sting. Is that a horrible thing to say? I just, I didn’t feel anything anymore. But everytime I look at you, _wow_, I feel everything,” His voice trembled while he spoke, and he looked at the ground in embarrassment, “But I understand if you don’t feel the same way. I won’t stop being friends with you and I won’t tell anyone about this. Just, _please_ don’t stop talking to me if you don’t like me back. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Will rarely saw Mike this vulnerable. His eyes were bloodshot and his nose was running, he was wringing his hands and his shoulders were shaking. He couldn’t believe what he was saying. That he, _Mike Wheeler_, who so fiercely loved and protected and cared about Eleven, felt more strongly about _him_. 

When he started to laugh, he knew he fully deserved the bizarre look Mike gave him, “You can’t…like me. Nothing ever goes right for me! Seriously! I was stuck in the Upside Down for a _week_. I was possessed by an evil mind flayer. I have been hopelessly in love with you- a boy- for longer than I can remember and you’re telling me you actually like me? This has to be a joke!” He was laughing so hard his stomach hurt, and Mike quickly joined in. He felt like a little kid for the first time in nearly two years. He dropped the weight on his shoulders and let himself laugh so hard he was crying again with his best friend.

“I may love pulling pranks on you, but I promise this is not a joke.” Mike finally said through giggles stepping closer to Will and wrapping his hand around the smaller boy’s. 

“Friends don’t lie.” Will quipped. His cheeks were aching from the dumb smile on his face.

“I’m not lying!” He gently pushed Will and their giggles fell silent, leaving nothing but the sound of the rain. Mike’s eyes were intensely focused on his, and Will suddenly realized that he was soaked to the bone, had been ugly-crying for nearly an hour, and probably had snot on his face, “Um, should I kiss you now or…?”

“No.” Will answered quickly, immediately regretting it, “I’m just…scared. I’ve never kissed anyone before.” 

He thought maybe that could be a deal breaker, that Mike would be annoyed because he’d been making out with Eleven all summer and probably knew exactly what he was doing. The gentle smile that spread across Mike’s face let him relax a bit, though. “That’s fine. Why don’t you just…tell me when you’re ready? You can take as long as you want.”

Will inched closer to him, squeezing Mike’s hand, “Really? You’re okay with that?”

Mike pressed a tender kiss to his temple, causing his stomach to perform an Olympic gymnastics routine, “Of course I’m okay with that. Now let’s go inside before we get electrocuted out here.” 

Will remembered exactly what it felt like when he woke up after Hopper saved his life in the Upside Down. His nerves were on fire, his lungs hurt when he took a breath, but he felt like was coming home. He felt like he had been given a second chance. He felt the same way right in this moment, with Mike’s arm wrapped around his shoulders, leading him into the house where they would spend the night laughing and playing games and dressing up in dumb costumes because they were best friends, and nothing in the world could change that. Not even them fighting for their lives against the mind flayer, or Will moving away, or their awful, spitty first kiss that they would have months later because that’s just how first kisses go. No matter what, they would always have each other.


End file.
